Being a long-time guinea pig owner and all around rodent person, I’ve been more excited than anyone probably should be about the upcoming Disney/Bruckheimer offering called G-Force, a CGI-enhanced action comedy about high-tech superspies who just happen to be guinea pigs. Now, the premise may not sound like much (and it’s certainly likely to end up as just another cute-talking-animals-seamily-interacting-with-live-actors summer flick), but the trailer actually shows some promise. Check it out:
Of course, the actors constitute a Hollywood all-star lineup (Nicolas Cage, Penélope Cruz, Steve Buscemi, the list goes on), but more importantly, the writers seem to understand their subject matter – that is, guinea pigs. Sure, Rodney the smart-aleck guinea pig in Dr Dolittle had some of the best lines in the film (which is not saying much, admittedly), but he wasn’t particularly cavylike. G-Force features guinea pigs whose “IQ is off the scale and their motor skills are incredible.” As anyone who has ever owned a cavy can tell, that describes the polar opposite of an actual guinea pig. (Just this morning, I tried to coax my GP to do a trick – stand up on his hind legs – but he couldn’t even figure out where to look for the bribe carrot.)
Moreover, their team leader is named Darwin. That’s about the funniest name possible for a creature that is pretty much the strongest proof against the theory of evolution. I mean, what kind of natural selection could produce a fat, clumsy, noisy critter whose primary asset for survival is to look so pitiful that no self-respecting carnivore would be caught dead hunting one?